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Blessings to you ALL as you negotiate
this very rocky road. Hopefully your knitting
will bring you comfort in some small measure.
Thanks for the beautifully written post!


My heart goes out to you and your family. Words fall short in times like these, but I'm sending you good vibes if you need 'em!


Wow. I hope things start to calm down for you and your family soon.


I wish I were closer to lend a hand. Instead I'll keep you and your extended family in my thoughts. Thank you for your post.


That's a lot! Don't rush the knitting, or the back. Take care of yourself the best you can. We'll be here when you're ready.

The Feminist Mafia

Good god, that's a lot to deal with!! Are you sure you're OK? Really?


Thank you for writing this post--it is doubly informative. I wish the best for you and your family. And your knitting.


i'm sorry.

Ann in Nashville

Wow, Julia, what a story. You sound remarkably sane amid all this! I'll be thinking about you as you navigate the weeks to come.


So sorry. Sending you and your family lots of sympathy and best wishes.


I wish I had something more productive to say beyond "If only more people talked to their parents about their retirement plans and health care," you know? When you're in the thick of it, it's hard to know that you're doing a good job for your parents, but the Mister is there, and being there is a good enough start.


Baltar is incredibly stupid for such a smart guy. I still haven't figured out why but I'm hoping that at some point he redeems himself. I think that Starbuck should just get her shit together. She's a mess.

Welcome to the world of getting older. It's a shock to realize that the care facilities don't want the elderly if they're too much trouble. We went through that with the FIL who ended up housed with the mentally disabled because he was wheelchair bound and unable to use the toilet by himself. It was the only place that would take him that we could stand to have him be. Hiring someone to change diapers for a grown man is nearly impossible. It isn't something you can do at home and have a life. And yes, they say they want to move, they're excited, you work, you plan, but they won't move. I am so sorry for what is going on in your life and I don't have much to offer than try to keep things in perspective, get your back healthy again, stay as sane as you can. What society is going to do when the boomers all reach advanced old age will be a sorry sight to see.


I'm sorry to hear about all of this. It sounds as though you're all doing the best you can, which is ... the best you can do under these circumstances.

I hope your back feels better very soon. And I'm glad to hear you're past the Celtic Dreams problem.


my prayers are with you and yours as you go through these difficult days. Remember to bottle the good moments! They are there even in the middle of the worst moments. Knit on and know that you are not alone.


Wow! Best wishes to you and your family.


Valerie in San Diego

No one here feels *obligated* to comment. But we want you to know that we are thinking of you... that we know how just regular old real life comes and bites you in the butt sometimes and that yeah, it's all part of life and having parents and growing older, but it still bites. So we're in community with you. And we are thinking of you. We like you. Hope things start improving soon.


Jesus. And I was whining about a little back pain and an eye exam. I hope for some sunshine to enter your life soon.

Jeanne B.

As I said in the comments on another blog, it seems to have been a tough week for many of us. I've been in similar shoes. Just last year I dealt with being my elderly parents' caretaker and I had my own run-ins with The System (some of which still make me angry). You don't need the details to know that I understand where your head is at right now. Remember to take care of yourself, too. Replenish when you can so you can have more to give them when they need it—because they'll need it. You and Mister are entering a difficult phase with his parents. I don't envy you. I sympathize, empathize, and pray for your strength and bravery. Blessings to you and your family.

Paula in Iowa

I send you great but careful hugs. Please, please do what you must to Take.Care.Of.Yourself. You are the only one of you that your family has! Know that there are many, many folks who are praying for you and yours. Also, do not bang your head on the wall, it doesn't help and only hurts more.


I'm thinking of you and yours Julia.

Losing my Dad in December was/is unbearable but I thank god every day that the end was quick and he did not have to go the SNF/rehab route because that indignty would have been more than he or any of us could bear.

I have no words of wisdom except to say that you have a whole community of armchair therapists that are willing to listen, be a shoulder if you need one and love you even when you're not knitting :)


Hang on in has a habit of coming along all at once, but eventually things will work themselves through. (I know, I`ve been there, but thank heavens I live in the UK and decent health care.)
In the meanwhile take care of yourself and concentrate on the essentials, plus any fun you can fit in. And teach your five year old to put your socks on for you!


Damn, Julia. It's been a long fezzle, hasn't it? I'm not around the corner but I'm not terribly far away either. If I can help, please let me know. And I'll keep my fingers crossed for SPA. It won't be the same without you.


Hang in there.


I'm sorry you and and Mister are going through all this. I fear you have learned (the hard way) the only way to get through the system: perservere and keep calling. Sometimes you get someone who knows something, or has a clue, or has a heart, and it can take multiple iterations. As you found out. There is never anything easy about this stage of a parent's life. It's not IF, it's when.

I'm hoping for SPA for you, but there is always next year.


My best wishes to you and all your family as you work through all this!

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