In the Paper this Week

I had a letter to the editor of my local paper published on Friday of this last week.  I thought that I'd share it with you.

A New Social Contract

Dear Editor,

Recently, readers of the Daily News were informed that our police
department has employed the olfactory skills of a drug-sniffing dog
to better secure our city against drug use by our fellow citizens.
Tourists and Inn-streeters [the local teenagers hang out] alike can now
look forward to having their persons examined by this sensitive and
no-doubt expertly trained detection system while they window shop
and enjoy the sights of our fair city.

But they should know that, like the son of a friend of mine, they too
can be called into court for just being in the company of someone who
attracts the attention of this drug-sniffing dog.  So I would like to
suggest a new social contract to my neighbors, in the spirit of self-
preservation and keeping their names out of the police log lest they
become the object of speculation and failing reputation.

When greeting friends, instead of asking how they are, or how the
children are doing in school, waste no time with such pretty
flourishes. There is not a moment to lose -- the dog may be at your
heels for all you know.  Ask to see the contents of their pockets or
purse, and check not only for telltale baggies, but also for any
paraphernalia that may harbor residue.  Smell their breath for extra
security.  If they are only a casual acquaintance and you feel
awkward about asking, check the contours of their clothes.  Are there
any bulges that may not be explained by anatomy?  Very good friends
might even consider the full-body pat-down.  Given time, such
exchanges might replace the ineffective handshake as the typical
American greeting.  Who needs the Fourth Amendment when you are --
and have -- a vigilant friend?

Just looking out for you,

julia fc

Comments

[Sharon]

Excellent letter. You're my new hero.

[Rachel H]

Wait, so there's a police dog wandering out there sniffing for people who are not obviously doing drugs Right Then and There or necessarily acting in a manner which would suggest incapacitation? And the police are bringing people in just based on Fido's nose? Geez. Lord help anyone walking past a rock concert letting out.

[Jen in CT]

Nice letter. I hope people will stop letting our rights be eroded soon--it's starting to get scarey...

[susan]

Fourth Amendment? What Fourth Amendment? The SC did away with *that* a long time ago. Plus, a sniff by a drug dog doesn't implicate the Fourth Amendment:
http://caselaw.lp.findlaw.com/scripts/getcase.pl?court=US&vol=000&invol=03-923

P.S. Make sure you wash all your paper money since a good portion in circulation has traces of drugs on it.

[Riin]

Um...what city do you live in so I know never to visit there? Nothing personal, I just don't want to end up in jail for standing in the wrong place at the wrong time.

[Marcy]

Well done, Julia!

[Rachel]

You are so right! and to think they believe it is done in order to protect us,,, ackh!

[Kelli]

Hmmm, yes, the drug dog tagged my locker at school (a few years back). I've never in my life done drugs, I do, however, raise rabbits. Guess what had peed on my coat? I guess rabbit urine and drugs smell a lot alike. Grrrrrr.

[Lee Ann]

But if I wash all my money, they'll haul me in for money laundering...

:-}

[Suzanne V. (Yarnhog)]

It would be really, really funny if it weren't so really, really scary. Ignore your rights and they'll go away. Fight for them and you'll probably get arrested. You choose. Welcome to the new America.

[Tonia]

Great letter!

A friend of ours' son drove to school in high school. One day they had a drug bust and the "drug" sniffing dog hit on his car. The police tore it to pieces. They ripped open the seats, tore up the carpet, the hole works. You know what they found? The "drug" sniffing dog hit on some donuts! Kind of ironic isn't it?. After the fact it was pretty funny, but it still was wrong. He did get a completely new interior out of it though.

So you might want to make sure you are not carrying any pastry products on your person as well. ;)

[Arianne]

Excellent!! Go you! :)

[Slip Slip]

Perfectly wonderful. Thank you. I promise to clean out my pockets before my next visit to you. XXOO

[Thalia]

You know, that's utterly ridiculous. Guilt by association? No no no. And although I think drug-sniffing dogs are great resources... you know, at airports and things... having people basically randomly sniffed for drugs kind of freaks me out.

[Lucia]

Gack. I almost want to volunteer to be a test case.

[sara l]

Good to know,
I was in town this am, I held my head down low, held my bag of yarn close to me, and pushed the carriage as fast as i could through town. We were not looking for any trouble.
ugh, What will they think of next?

[Sarah]

That's a great letter. I am astonished that any city would even consider siccing a drug-sniffing dog on citizens just going about their business -- that's disgusting.

[Julia]

What?? Sorry, there just are no other words right now.

[Shannah]

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Alas, our newspaper here in TX would never publish such a thing. Wonderful for you to write. Wonderful to have independent press still (whatever that means).

[sarah]

The UK sees you and raises... DNA sampling. Anyone arrested for a chargeable offence is required to give a DNA sample to be added to the national DNA database. Even if you're cleared and never charged, the sample remains on file. If you can prove you're COMPLETELY innocent, as in they got your name wrong (they wanted Jack Daniels and you're Jack Smith) the process of removing your sample is complex and may take more than a year. Of course the legislation requires the samples only be used for crime detection or purposes related to that. But hey, laws can be changed and the insurance companies really would like access to the goldmine.

[Beth S.]

Snerk! ;-)

[AlisonH]

WOW!!! Thank you for writing that letter, and thanks to them for publishing it. WOW.

[Spinning Dervish]

Wow, really, really well written. As the bumper sticker says, "If you're not outraged, you're not paying attention."